I recently began a train of introspection to help better understand who I am. I noticed another sociopathic idiosyncrasy. I believe from this stems all misconceptions of the psychopath’s lack of emotion. As one can easily see, I am talking about how calm we normally are, especially in emotionally devastating events. The imagery painted by society of the individual standing still amidst the crowd running for its life as rubble falls and crashes onto the people. The o’too-cliche scene of the man witnessing the death of many people and not showing any change in facial expression. Our calm has been highly misconstrued and has deceived the world of our true nature.
Our calm is not eternal or forever. Nor does our calm symbolize the eye at the center of a hurricane, and foreshadow the manifestation of our intense hate, malice, or any other destructive emotion. We do not hide ourselves, their is no true psychopath hidden behind a mask of lies. Our calm is just our choice. We choose to not be emotionally attached because we find it wasteful to be attached to whatever event is at hand. We reserve our daily intellectual capacities so that we may sparingly divulge our energies into what we find truly worthwhile and interesting. We are not patiently storing our hate withing ourselves and walk around like a ticking time bomb. We are rather like automated password locked computers that only allow access to certain keywords or phrases.
We are unapologetic-ally meticulously emotionally selective.
I found pride within the dry desserts of my emotional plane. The seemingly endless vacuum of a soul I had comforted me because of the obvious difference there was between me and them. However, this attribute becomes suddenly typologized, stereotyped, and generalized. We are of an emotionally selective group. Never will you see us cry over the death of an individual society tells us to weep over. Restrictions and obligations such as family will not stir our hearts. No…
Our hearts are our own. We are individuals of individuals. We segregate ourselves through our own constructs. Those whom we encounter are segregated within our worlds as well. we experience empathy, but it is different to the non-sociopaths. I look at your definition of empathy and feel as though my deviation is the same. I feel as you feel; I just happen to feel more. We surpass our appetites and use our love to manifest our ideals, and mine happen to revolve around the poetic potential of the moment.
We are not incapable. We are just scrutinizingly objective/selective.
I believe that in all lives we can find a reoccurring theme. There will be some idea or conflict that will remain eternal throughout our lives. Mine is the tangibility of the mind. In many ways I am like a guinea pig used for my own experiments. Most of them have been thought experiments but they all stem out into the physical world so there really is no distinction to be made.
Now imagine the mind to be water. There are three states when it comes to water: solid, liquid, and gas. Colder climates will have ice and the warmer it gets the more abundant the other states of water there will be. Now imagine the environments of which the state of water exists to be the environments of which we reside. There are individuals out there who are less flexible with their thoughts, ideas, and imagination because their climate remains stagnate and inhibits progress and thus freezes the culmination of cognitive growth. These “freezing” climates would be like the minds of the illiterate, poor, and government bound.
Now enter the stage of where liberation or growth begins to culminate. Ideas of morality and equality emerge. This warmer climate would be well paired with religious households but in America. There is still a wide range of limiting ideas that could apply to whatever religion you are forced into but there is a wide range of liberating ideas, philosophies, and teachers that one could supplement themselves with. The more intellectual freedoms that are offered the warmer their intellectual environment becomes and the more freely they will be able to roam within the ethers of their minds.
Finally comes the last stage of the cognitive water, gas. This is when there are no faculties of intellectual confinement and one is free to roam and conceive new thoughts and ideas. One could imagine such a climate to be the equivalent to the laboratories of NASA or some other organization created for the purpose of experimentation, learning, and advancing. At such a stage no line of inquiry is prohibited or inclined. There are no preset notions of right and wrong, just discovery.
Now like all water vapors, oceans, and glaciers we do not remain in one state forever. If one is born in a particularly cold climate one does not have to stay there. However, just like how ice can eventually become gas, the gas can also become ice. As we advance through life we will not have any more control over the inputs of life today than we will tomorrow. To remain an intellectual one must stimulate one’s self with new ideas or else the mind will become cold and stop growing.
All want to be loved. All have an inherent desire to be liked, desired, and loved. All social actions stem from these base needs.
From this comes the projection of self. We mold our personalities to resemble the people who we deem to be the most attractive and respectable. As individuals we care too much about what other people think and this limits our actions from being true; we care about being loved more than we care about being truthful.
Whenever we compromise our appetite to be loved over being who we actually are, we are projecting. We project falsehood and hide our faces from the world because we fear that we will be unloved. The need to be admired becomes a driving factor in our lives.
There is a natural occurring phenomenon in this world, and that is the Selfie. There really does not need to be an explanation for I am sure that most of you have partaken in one or two of them yourselves. Even I have taken selfies before. I did not think a thing about them until today. Allow me to explain why I believe that selfies are of a detriment to society.
First what is a selfie? Like all intellectual problems, we should define what we are questioning to gain a better understanding of where and how we should stand on a certain subject. A selfie is when one takes a picture of ones self. But there is more to a selfie than a single photo, isn’t there?
A selfie does not come from merely one photo. A selfie is founded upon the tens of hundreds of photos you took beforehand just to make sure that the photo is “just right”. Sometimes you do not even post the selfie. There are times where you just keep them locked away within the ether of digital memory stored within your digital device. Why do we take selfies?
What purpose do they serve us? All selfies are published on social networking sites. They are used to promote the individual that is being presented. Where is the harm in that? Take a look at the previous statement again. A tool which is used to promote the individual. How is one allowing one’s self to be promoted? Merely by the skin upon one’s face.
Often times the promotion is guised by negative comments of one’s self, and this practice is called “fishing for compliments”. People purposely say that they are ugly so that people will reassure them that they are indeed not so. This is an ugly practice for it does not reassure people but rather give them their “fix” of attention to function. This promotes attention-whoring instead of mental well-being. Why?
When “egging” on individuals to focus on one’s appearance, the spotlight turns away from the interior attributes and focuses solely on the physical appearances. This often leads to individuals valuing their looks more than the intellectual property that they can produce. This train of thought will ultimately lead to the mass of social network consumers to value their physical appearances more than their thoughts, and even more devastating, they will begin to value the looks of others over their intellectual prowess.
This acceptance-seeking attitude also develops an over-dependence on others. If one’s view of social success is dependent on comments, hits, likes, and follows, than one puts one’s own security at the whim of their peers. This can create self-consciousness and self-conscious thoughts, which is pretty pathetic.
*This is a profile of a person I know. I have dissected what I can from his actions and the people that surround them. Although this is a discourse founded upon personal inquiry. Nothing was founded by external inquiry.
The Whacking Cat
HE is open minded and open to new experiences. He is described to be kind but also intimidating to some. He prides himself in his accomplishments and finds joy in discovering new things. He has a thirst to “live life” to its fullest.
Now lets dig deeper and find his weak points.
I find it very revealing to focus on the relationships the individual has with their mother and any other significant female relationship they have had during childhood.
He showers them with gifts and memento to remind his mother and sisters of how much he adores them. This reveals a desire or necessity for emotional security. Needing to constantly remind his females that he loves them and cares for them. A self-conscious complex is revealed. This translate also to him caring about what others think of him. Which also points to the idea that behind his thirst to live life is to show that he is indeed living life. “Proving” to others that he is not wasting it.
Now onto other revealing factors.
He is at the mercy of his emotional state. He cannot handle his emotions, he has no defense mechanism besides riding his emotions out. His state of being sways at the mercy of the people around him and his environment. An emotional intelligence weakness. He finds comfort in a God for all the turmoil that he goes through is validated and if he believes that they are with purpose he is thus comforted. A little pathetic
He has no control over anger, depression, or happiness. Whatever emotional state he is in, all his efforts to change will be useless for he has no knowledge of how to effectively manipulate or mediate his own emotions. He lacks in that area of maturity.
This makes him highly self-conscious and so he has the need to show that he is indeed mature and doing better than other people. So he has defined what a “mature” individual lives, looks, and thinks like and follows these guidelines to the best of his ability. He figures he is doing well for his “mature” construct has deceived him into thinking that he making progress in maturing.
I would go on but this is starting to get redundant.
I often forget what it is like to be human. Strange sentence isn’t?
I forget what the norm is and my expectations of people come off as arrogant or ignorant.
I am usually an observant person and I have found that I fluctuate in my “humanity”. On some parts of the year I show more human like qualities and others not so much. So what do I mean by human? I think it will be easier to explain if I elucidate what it means to be less human. Most people are not curious about the world and actively go out to learn things, whether they be humanities, life, or music. People tend to just want to enjoy life and laugh. In my less human endeavors I do not seek to enjoy life but rather just to experience all aspects of it. I find a off-put joy in my experience and learning of different perspectives and wisdom.
I was reminded of the difference between mere thought patterns between the people that surround me. Curiosity is not as crucial to there lives as I expect it to be because I am just merely different. Now, there are times where I display unplanned amounts of humanity and kindness. Although I am not very well known for kindness, there are instances where I surprise even myself.
As an individual that likes to coordinate and plan all things in my control, this is one thing that I seem to have less control over.